Will you be my quaran-tine? - Dating in a global pandemic

Our anonymous writer discusses the ups and downs of dating during a global pandemic and the surprise connections that can come out of a world living online in 2020.

In hindsight, 2020 was not the best year to decide to join the dating game.

But after seven years single, two trips overseas, and rediscovering my passion for writing, my self-confidence was finally back up to level ‘Download Tinder.’ I was more than ready. Like I said - seven years single…It’s a long time.

And for a little while, it was going pretty well. I matched with a couple of guys who had similar interests to me, were polite, didn’t ask for nudes after five minutes. One of them, a guy called Harry*, I even met up with a couple of times. Though we had a lot in common, I didn’t feel that spark - but after only two meetings, who does? I liked him enough, and we had all the time in the world to get to know each other.

Then along came the dark cloud of 2020.

With lockdown coming into full effect, I returned home to my parents’ in Western Australia with no return ticket. Oh, well, I thought. Dating had been worth a shot.

But if you’re going to date during a pandemic, 2020 might as well have been the year to do it, because of that magical little thing called technology. Harry and I kept in touch, first with texts, then with phone calls - both audio and video. 

We watched Netflix through Teleparty (a function that allows a chatbox while you both watch the same film - it’s truly a great feature) and watched a couple of Studio Ghibli films as well as all three seasons of Avatar: The Last Airbender. He became the first person I wanted to tell things to. I finally felt that spark.

But I can’t run on text messages alone, and as borders remained up and cases did the same, returning to life in Melbourne seemed further and further away. Technology is great, but it can’t quite make up for the real thing of going out with someone. 

Over a year of restrictions has shown all of us that staring at faces on a screen, occasionally informing one another they’re on mute, is no substitute for human contact.

I’m someone who needs physical relationships - no, not like that… okay, maybe a little bit like that - and without being in the same room as him, to hang out, hear each other’s laughs, it felt as though getting to know Harry had come to a bit of a standstill. And my mind helpfully filled that void with doubts and anxieties.


What if we’ve spent a year getting to know each other, only to find when we finally meet up that we don’t click?

here are so many things we haven’t talked about, what if, when he learns the darkest parts of me, he runs away screaming?

What if, what if, what if…


I became afraid that all this time texting, talking, was filled with expectation and build-up, and that we’d only be disappointed when we finally met up again. That we’d spent a year waiting for something that never actually came.

But living online is the new normal, and if that includes dating, I’m okay with that. At the very least, I’ve made a kind and supportive new friend. 

All we can do - all any of us can do - is take one day at a time, and try not to stress too much about the future, because now, more than ever, it is shifting and unpredictable, just like swiping left on Tinder. And when Harry and I eventually meet up, who knows? If it’s meant to be it will be.

*Names have been changed for privacy reasons

WORDS: ANONYMOUS
PHOTOGRAPHY: MARKUS WINKLER